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breakdown on the horizon
2002-03-13, 4:10 a.m.

i am postponing my nervous breakdown until this weekend. I have far too much to do. In addition when i informed my roomate i was on the verge of a breakdown she grabbed me by my sleeves and rather controled and almost demonically informed me that im not allowed to have a breakdown and i was ordered to keep it together since one of us has to stay in sanity and if i lose it she will lose it.

I am begining to think maybe i already broke down. because im so apathetic towards everything. and ive lost all ability to gauge anything. i cant tell if im hungry, tired, thristy, lonely, or what.

and i cant really pinpoint why i feel as if im on the verge of breakdown. what factors should induce this. I mean everything appears to be going okay.

since i operate best under the chaos theory it probably has something to do with the stress of living life in extremes.

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