finally made it
well well well
now i am out in the pacific norhtwest for a week and its beautiful here and much cooler, temperturewise and culturewise
i had the most incredicble experience im not sure what to make of it.
It seems my life is in balance now. I have the perfect job good health and an interesting love life that is filed with nothing but peace and love and respect andim notsure many people can say they have the same.
I spent so long trying to fix the trauma of my childhood never telling anyone my secrets of whathappened to me when i was young and re enacting that trauma over and over again and now ive cometo the otherside
ITs so nice here and im glad i made it. no more self harm no more crying no more horrible depression no more codepency. everyday is like hmm what am i going to do today how exciting to be alive.
I realize now i really do live a charmed life. my whole life is a vacation! I get to sleep in a hammock and help people half the time then vacation the other half go to interesting places, get vegan donuts, meet kindhearted concious individuals.
ive changed so much in the last year its supriseing. im sorta jelous of the adolescents that get to go through the program i work at, if only i had the oppurtunity to get aware i could have saved myself a lot of time.
then again this whole struggle was a beautiful struggle. years later im a vegan edge peacemonger. how nice this is and how i wouldnt have believed it four years ago taht life could be this smoothe