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advice for life
2004-04-15, 7:02 p.m.

as i was writing my previous entry i got a call from an old friend and they asked about how i was doing if i was still up to the same old shit who i was hanging out with. wondering why i had cut ties with a few people and why i have chosen to say so little on keepign myself isolated from the world. tellign me they wanted to die becuase things were awful. asking me how i survived.

then after the short briefing they said wow you should put this somewair so here it is

this is the best way i can say it. when you know that soemthing isent working you shouldnt water dead flowers.

if its a friendship or a relationship you have to sit down and make a decision to move on because things arent going to get better.

especially if the reason you are friends with soemone isent becuase they understand you. especially if you are friends with someone because you are lonely and dont want to be alone. if they are they only ones around. when you build a "friendship" and you have to constantly comprimise who you are so the other person feels better it will never work and it usually ends up messy.

why i was friends with them was wrong but being lonely and in pain it seems better to have someone around to listen.

specifically i wasnt too hurt about the way things ended. its easy to get misunderstood when a person decides to hate.

it was funny to see someone that thaut they understood realize they have no fuckign idea. looking in from the outside and watch them live their life doing the same thing being the same angry person is sad but life is sad. and you cant change everything.

it is never a good idea to tell soemone that they are the reason you are alive because that kind of lie can never be taken back. i have said this to a former "friend" who now probably sits there saying well yeah im responbisble for them being alive. that kind of lie doesnt help it just destroys

i dont know why im typing all of this but it really made me think so im goign to go think now.

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